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    Welcome to Snarky Kitten: the home of sarcasm, wit, and chocolate cake. I've learned that the only way to survive life is to find the humor in every day events. Join me as I snark about my life and the idiots around me.



The Greatest Sandwich Ever

Disclaimer: OK… pardon my constant food postings this week. I’m home for the holidays… there’s really nothing to do but eat… and Mom has filled the house with tempting treats as usual… you know how that goes. Besides… once I get home it’s back to my usual bare pantry… may as well bulk up now. *Winks*

We had a turkey dinner yesterday for Dad’s birthday… which always means leftovers. I actually love turkey leftovers because it allows me to make my favorite (and the most unhealthy) sandwich ever. I call it… the bread sandwich. Basically, it’s a whole lot of carbs with a little turkey thrown in as garnish… two slices of soft bread, a layer of dressing/stuffing (about a half inch), and a layer of turkey (about a quarter inch). It is SO good. My mom and sis add some cranberry sauce for more flavor. My dad and other sister heat it up with gravy. I prefer mine simple and cold and delicious…



The Cake Olympics

Every year my dad picks out his own birthday cake. They’re always really… ummmm… bad. Aside from Dad’s birthday cake every year, I’ve never really met a cake I didn’t like… I’m an equal opportunity caker… even when everyone hates a cake, I manage to enjoy it anyway. So this tells you just how bad dad’s cakes are.

They sometimes come from the grocery store or a wholesale club… last year was even a really expensive super-fancy bakery cake. All awful. I’m not sure how he does it, but if there’s a bad cake in New England… he will track it down.

Today, a few hours before his birthday dinner, he ran out to Walmart (of all places) and grabbed a “variety pack” of cake. A fourth each of german chocolate, double chocolate, carrot, and red velvet cakes. This is ALWAYS a bad sign… he loves the variety pack desserts… and the variety packs are usually the worst.

Tonight… in a very bold move… I opted for half a slice of carrot and half a slice of red velvet. I was prepared for the worst. I took a big gulp of water and then dove in. OMG they were SO good!

As we discussed how good everyone’s choices were and debated why it was called red velvet cake (Dad is color blind, so this was a tough argument to win), I declared red velvet the winner for tonight. Then I announced to my family that tomorrow I would sample both of the chocolate cakes… and the next day I would then have a face-off between the winners from tonight and tomorrow night to determine the ultimate cake winner. Of course they chuckled and rolled their eyes at me (I get this reaction from them to most anything I say).

But to me… this is way more exciting than the Olympics…



Zomething Zad

A dark shadow has fallen upon the snarky kingdom.  I’m beyond depressed.  Is it the economy?  No.  Seasonal Affective Disorder?  I wish.  A plague of boils and locusts?  I could be so lucky.  What I have to share with you is much more apocalyptic than any of these.

MILLER HAS STOPPED PRODUCING ZIMA!   *Collapses*

OK… I know you’re thinking, “Wait… they were still making it?” And yes they were.  I haven’t had it in years, but it was always there on the beer shelf like an old favorite blanket.  It was comforting to know that my all time favorite beverage would always be there for me (even though it hasn’t been socially acceptable in a long time).  Sometimes I would stare at it longingly as I passed by… too embarrassed to buy it.  I was waiting for its comeback.

I have so many fond memories of Zima.  Road trips, nights out, nights in, smuggling 40 oz. Zima’s into the movies.  (ROFL… yes, they made 40’s.)  When it was new, everybody drank it… even boys!  It really was a great drink.., not as bitter and filling as beer… not as sweet and thick as other girly drinks.  “Zomething Different” the ads would affirm.  *Sigh*

This morning, an email was instantly circulated among my closest friends with the subject “OMG BAD NEWS”.  We will be buying every 6- pack of Zima we can get our hands on so that we can have a bon voyage party for Zima… to lay our dear friend to rest.  *Hears Taps playing in the background*



We interrupt…

… your regularly scheduled program for the following geek update:

Holy patch, Batman!  We got a new update for Warcraft last night to prepare for the expansion coming out next month.  I won’t bore you with all the nerdy details… but OH-EM-GEE, I love love LOVE the new talents.  I’m an absolute monster now!  The only problem is… so is everyone else (grrrrrrrr).  Some seriously fun stuff, though!  Wheeeeeee!



Where’s Snarky?

YES! I’m still alive! A few updates for this random post (kind of a month’s worth of posts in one):

1. Although I’ve done MORE than my fair share of whining in the last month, I have managed to survive the rib incident (shhhh… let’s not talk about it). I’m feeling much, much better… and best of all, I can sleep again! (Most nights I spent whimpering to myself until the drugs finally knocked me out! LOL)

2. My work-issued iBook finally bit the dust. Not sure who really won the battle. I lost everything on it! (Insert hind-sighted advice on backing up files here.) But really… no big loss. Glad to be rid of the beast… my nemesis… hmmm… maybe I won?

3. I finally hit 70 a longggg time ago in Warcraft. At first I thought “then what?”… but I’m finding there’s so much more to the game once you get to 70. Too much, really. LOL Although the new stuff is fun, I do miss the old questing days, too. *tear*

4. April was a very fun month as anticipated… it’s a good thing birthdays are only once a year.

5. My partner in crime at work and I came up with a brilliant idea to get rich quick. We’re looking for investors if you have a little extra cash! LOL Keep in mind this brilliant idea came after we both had several popsicles… and the shakes were setting in. Let’s just say I’d like to put two good things together… popsicles and liquor! (I really didn’t learn my lesson from the rib incident, did I?)

6. 15 days of school left! Summer here I come!

Now to attend to a month’s worth of stuff that I’ve been ignoring… *sigh*



Road Trip!

Gas for 6 hour drive to Ohio… $100

Purchases at outlet mall (Pottery Barn, Coach, etc.)… $750 (and a security call from Mastercard)

Dinner out… $150

Hotel room… $100

Cocktails for hotel room… $50

Drunken fall on a slippery bathroom floor (and earning the new nickname “Riblet”)… 2 cracked ribs

Road trip with the girls… priceless!



Gram

My Grandma passed away this weekend.  We were as prepared for this as any family can be, but it has still been difficult to handle.  Most of all, I worry about my Mom and Grandpa.  She was the center of their world.  She hasn’t been able to do much for herself for many years… so Mom and Grandpa focused on her 24/7.  I’m glad they will be able to actually live their lives now… but they will be very lonely for awhile.  I’m also so happy that Gram is finally free of pain!

She truly was an amazing woman.  Although she was this tiny little thing, Grandma somehow managed to command everyone’s attention.  She lit up any room she was in.  Gram had a sharp wit, and the gift of storytelling (and after traveling the world, she had a lot of great stories).  She was adored by all!

I hope that I can be half the woman she was…



60, betches!

I’m not just talking about the current temperature in Chicago (yes… it’s 60 today… whoa)… I’m talking about Warcraft… I hit 60! Woooooooot!

I never thought World of Warcraft would be my sort of thing. I have never been interested in anything like it. I can’t even sit through movies like Lord of the Rings, let alone read the actual books. Despite my disinterest in it all, I decided to give it a try this fall… now I’m hooked.

Gone are the days when I dumped new gear that I earned just because it didn’t look cute. I don’t run away screaming like a girl anymore every time something comes at me. (I might utter an EEK when I see an elite monster of some sort stomping by, though.) I don’t cry during PVP now either (I just get really mad).

In fact, I was really proud of myself last week. I took down my first rogue alone in PVP. As a warlock, usually the only way I can kill one is if I have help. They hit me with stun and then two jabs with a sword and I’m dead before I can cast one spell. I really hate rogues. Anyway… there I was in the horde tunnel in Warsong Gulch… a twinked-out rogue heading my way and no back-up. EEK! Luckily I spotted him before he could disappear and stun me… it was on! I feared him and hit him with my DOTs (and maybe a death coil, too)… deadzo! Now, I died 3 seconds later… but he was dead FIRST! *buffs her nails*

I owe all my skills in WoW to my questing partner, Elpirrurris. He’s taught me everything I know and has really spoiled me rotten! He protects me from the monsters and somehow remains patient with my constant noob issues. We still have a lot of “run run run run RUNNNNNN” moments, but it’s always a good time. I have to give props to Chan (& Pinga) for so many instance runs I’ve lost count… and to Lowtuss for popping in to help whenever she can, too. And of course, I have to thank all of the alliance tools out there in PVP who have fostered a growing rage inside me.

Now the long, hard grind to 70…



Snarky Kitten’s Travel Guide

There are some things you can only learn through life experience. In my journeys this week, I have learned several valuable lessons.

1. Beware: Minty/shimmery lipgloss poses a threat to national security. I mean, I always knew it could cause a little trouble… but I had no idea how serious these powers were. I was also pleasantly surprised to learn that placing said lipgloss in a quart-sized baggie will magically eliminate all danger! Whew!

2. Be smart: Never travel anywhere in the winter.

3. Be selfish: Become one of those tools who carries all of their baggage on the airplane. I’ve always loathed these people. They completely slow the boarding process. They clunk you in the head, they knock you in the shins, and they hog all the overhead bins. I now see the need to never let the baggage people get their hands on actual baggage.

4. Be nice: Even in the most frustrating situations, a kind person can make all the difference. With all of our trouble, we met a lot of passengers and employees who were nice, funny, and laid back. The kindness of others really helped to make a stressful situation more tolerable.

5. Be careful: There is no code for “pink” on the lost baggage report form. They will try to label it as “red”, but that’s not going to help anyone find your pink bag in a ginormous pile of luggage.

6. Be resourceful: Even with having access to only my mom’s old lady make-up and hair products, I still managed to look cute. Well, cute enough for the deep woods of Vermont.

Let’s hope the trip home has a lot fewer lessons for me!



House your Salad

I’ve become musically obsessed with deep house.

For those of you who aren’t in the know, like I was 8 months ago, deep house is not your typical techno type house music. It’s house music with soul, jazz, and funk fused together. It’s sexy. It’s stylish. It’s cool music for grown-ups. It’s best served on vinyl with a delicious dj mixing his heart out… creating that perfect vibe.

This is the home of deep house, if you want to hear for yourself…
www.dogglounge.com